


What Tony is Willing to Do for Cookies

by notoneforreality



Series: Darcy Lewis & Co. and Affiliated Stories [3]
Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Awesome Tony, Dialogue, Feelings, Gen, Lots of it, cryo, new bots
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-29
Updated: 2016-06-29
Packaged: 2018-07-19 01:24:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,399
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7338907
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/notoneforreality/pseuds/notoneforreality
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tony doesn't know whether Barnes can hear him. All he knows is that he likes talking, and Barnes is in no position to run away and/or tell anyone. So he starts talking, and doesn't really stop.<br/>Or: Sergeant Barnes, Agony Aunt</p>
<p>[short story sister fic to 'Darcy Lewis Protection Squad' from 'Darcy Lewis and Co.']</p>
            </blockquote>





	What Tony is Willing to Do for Cookies

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Darcy Lewis and Co.](https://archiveofourown.org/works/7155806) by [notoneforreality](https://archiveofourown.org/users/notoneforreality/pseuds/notoneforreality). 



> Based on/inspired by the fourth fic in my Darcyland story Darcy Lewis and Co. because I wanted to show what was going on at Tony's end, but I also wanted to try out a new style using almost exclusively dialogue.

"So, um, Darcy's upset. She misses you. A lot. But the team have got her back. They're looking after her. Uh...I wanted to say sorry about the arm. And I still don't love you for...for the stuff you did, But I know it wasn't your fault. S.I. got the countries involved to drop the Accords. So you're free. I guess. The team has come back – that's why you're here with me and Bruce instead of the medic team in Wakanda. Happy families again. Yay. So I'm gonna go now. Bye."

 

* * *

 

"Hey Sergeant Barnes. I'm gonna stick with that for now because we're not best buddies so I'm not calling you Bucky and all that jazz, but James is just weird. Anyway, I've managed to break Darcy again. I mean, I didn't. Natasha would have killed me. Scratch that, Doc Foster would have killed me. You should've seen the look she gave me when I even mentioned cookies. And I feel bad because when life sucks, it sucks hard, but I didn't mean anything by it. They're on her side. I suppose you are too. I am as well, I guess. It isn't right around here with you not around to terrorise and Darcy crying in her room all day and night. Shit. I wasn't supposed to tell you that. I mean, I don't even know if you can hear me but F.R.I.D.A.Y.'s scans say your brain is doing something and I wasn't supposed to worry you or anything. Shit, someone's coming. See ya, Sergeant."

 

* * *

 

"Sup, Sergeant. Can I hide out in here with you for a while? F.R.I.D.A.Y., don't let anyone in. So, Pepper's mad at me. Well, everyone's mad at me, as usual. Except Rhodey. Fuck, I do not deserve Rhodey, fuck. I basically got him paralysed, and he still doesn't blame me. He should. Anyway, Pepper's mad at me because I haven't finished the designs of the new StarkPhone that the board wanted three days ago. So far fairly usual, right? So I may or may not have been winding down with several bottles of the best – because trying to juggle everything right now is crazy – and I said to just take Darcy with her because you know the board are shit scared of her. Probably for good reason. Then Pepper got pissy because Darcy hasn’t gotten out of bed for three days. And fuck I wasn’t supposed to say that. Um...shit. Well, Darcy couldn’t go, anyway, and Pepper’s mad because the board really need to new designs because the Avengers are fucking expensive and S.H.I.E.L.D. refused to keep footing the bill a while back. Only don’t mention that to anyone. The others don’t know about it. Sometimes I wanna tell them just to see their faces but making Cap feel guilty makes me feel guilty. It’s a problem.”

“So, do you think two hours is a long enough time for Pep to have given up? She mentioned something about a meeting with someone from Wired at six. Anyway, I have an idea. F.R.I.D.A.Y., bring up the designs from folder 46f and take me down to the workshop.”

 

* * *

 

“You better love me, Sarge. I am a wonderful benevolent benefactor who is magnanimous in his exile. So, because I am a genius and actually kinda nice — wow, I never thought I’d head myself say that. Ugh. I need some alcohol right now because that was far to actual-nice-normal-human for me.”

“That’s better. Anyway I thought about what Pepper said, you know the stuff that I wasn’t supposed to tell you? Well, as much as I kind of hate Lewis (because really this level of hate is not necessary and why are all _my_ teammates on _her_ side), I know that mental issues fucking suck…. Yeah, I don’t wanna talk about it. _Anyway_ , because I am an awesome super-genius, I made her a little buddy. You know like my baby bots in the workshop? Dummy and Butterfingers and You. I know the names suck but I usually build these sorts of robots when I’m drunk and then they latch onto the first thing that I call them. They don’t seem to mind. So, yeah, a little bot to help her out and stuff and make sure she doesn’t die. Not that she would, I mean. Fuck’s sake. I’m just gonna leave now before I make things even worse.”

 

* * *

 

“So, Sarge, Lewis named her little friend. Tried to follow in my footsteps. So you knew J.A.R.V.I.S., right? Just A Very Intelligent System? And then F.R.I.D.A.Y., Friendly Reassuring Interface Display and Artificial Youngster? So Lewis has named her bot S.A.R.A.H.. And first I was like, Sarah’s a shit name for a bot, it sounds like a too-chirpy kid working an internship at the local hair salon, but then guess what; it stands for Small Ally: Reliable And Helpful. I mean, it needs work, but it’s a good sign. Maybe I’ll let her name my next creation. On second thoughts, no, I am not giving Lewis that responsibility. She’ll name it fucking Justin to piss me off. But yeah, I thought you’d want to know how she’s doing. Also Steve has locked my out of the workshop because I haven’t had ‘healthy sleeping patterns lately’ (can you hear the air quotes, I promise I’m doing really enthusiastic air quotes right now) as though I’ve ever gotten enough sleep ever in my life. So I thought I’d come and chill with you right now. Wait, was that insensitive? F.R.I.D.A.Y., was that insensitive? I thought I’d come and hang out with you. That better? Okay whatever.”

“Okay so I got distracted and I really have to go now because Cap is about to raze the building to try and find me but I’ll be back as soon as he lets me leave my rooms. I have another idea.”

 

* * *

 

“Okay, okay, it’s been ages, I know. Various scientists with doubtful doctorates have been blowing shit up for fun lately, and S.I. have been going mental. Then I’ve updated the suit and…yeah whatever. I’ll get to the point. I noticed some funny shit in the brain scans and I think….”

“So Cap is huge on this whole team training thing and I’m already late so I’m gonna go but I’ll get Bruce and we’ll go through this new information. There’s some stuff we can use here.”

 

* * *

 

“Bruce is here! And me, obviously. So there’s some fancy wiring in your head that looks like it’s what’s still keeping you jacked to HYDRA so we’re gonna take that out. It might hurt, but I also might be talking to someone who can’t even hear me so let’s see how it goes. Bruce, if you move that…yeah. And I’ll check this. F.R.I.D.A.Y. can you pull up the readings?”

 

* * *

 

“Hey, So Bruce and I are gonna let you out tomorrow, but I just wanted to have one last chat. I know you probably can’t even hear me and this is stupid, but I don’t care. We’re gonna let you out and make sure you’re okay, then find Lewis and bring her up and you can have a happy reunion and all that jazz. If you wanna come down to me later at some point, once you’re settled back in, I can have a look at fixing you up a new and improved arm. So I’ll see you tomorrow, Sarge.”

 

* * *

 

Bucky blinked blearily in the light and groaned as the last of the cold leaked out of his feet. Tony and Bruce were standing off to the side, behind a couple of machines. Bruce looked pleased with whatever the screen was showing him, but Tony was watching Bucky, the strange, shuttered look on his face that he got sometimes when he felt unsure. Bucky swallowed and opened his mouth. His voice was rusty from disuse, and the words rasped on his throat, but still:

“Thank you, Tony. For everything.”

Bruce looked confused, but Tony’s face cleared and Bucky hid a smile. Once he caught up with Darcy, he would take Tony up on the offer of a new arm.


End file.
